The Mystery of Madame X

Hello Gentlemen!

Hope things have been going well for you. As always, things are just peachy over here, though very, *very* busy… all in a good way, though it occasionally gets hard to remember that when I’m looking at my bed and realizing that it’s going to be a bit longer than I’d like before I can crawl into it, and a bit sooner than I’d like before I’m going to have to get out of it again.

C’est la vie, c’est la vie – and I do love it dearly, you know. It’s just very full right now, but I’m looking forward to winding down a little toward the end of the month, and giving myself a few days of great times and good company in CT right before the end of it all… which you’d already know if you had checked the calendar 🙂

Even with that mild touch of complaining, I really don’t have a right to. I pretty much partied like a rock star all over my last trip to Maine, and fully intend on doing it again soon! Maine has the best oysters ever. No contest, hands down, high five. And they also have a great looking bar that serves the most delicious Earl Gray vodka. If you thought Absolute Boston was good (and I did) then you should go and grab yourself a drink there. And take me with you!

I was chatting over one of these delightful beverages with a friend of mine (who’s well aware of this lifestyle and we do keep it light anyway – I’m not one to kiss and tell!) when she asked, in the most tactful way mind you, how much entertaining I’ve been doing lately. A simple question. And to me, with a simple answer… but apparently not so much in her eyes.

“Well, I keep up with some guys. I’ve been seeing mostly the same people for years now… occasionally I see someone new.” I’m roughly paraphrasing myself here – she asked for a little more explanation, and I’m *sure* you’ve noticed how skillfully I can dodge a direct answer.

“Oh, so you’re a sugar baby?” Direct quote from my barstool buddy.

Eeek… well then, she certainly did say it, didn’t she? Sugar Baby.

For those of you that I’ve known over the years, you may have noticed that I keep a fairly low profile most of the time, though I really did try and make the effort by joining Twitter. I generally don’t advertise (I just dislike the word advertise really), though a few times a year you might find me mentioning myself somewhere. It’s true that I’m significantly happier deepening an existing physical connection than just casting my net wide for new dance partners, and as a result I tend to see the same men regularly for months and years. As a result of *that* several of my friends have just set up recurring dates, on a given day of the week or whatever, so that we can keep our schedules as stress free as possible. I’m a stable enough part of some people’s lives for, uh, trusting partnerships surrounding modest assets to be a realistic consideration.

However, I cringe at the label of Sugar Baby. I pretty much thumb my nose at most labels, as you probably have already noticed. I break all molds! And I am *not* a sugar baby. One of the greatest things about this lifestyle, from my perspective, is that there are no expectations, commitments, or obligations. I truly do love seeing you, but when I walk out the door after seeing you, I don’t want either of us to have any reason to see each other again aside from the sheer desire to do so.

Being a sugar baby would ruin that entirely! I don’t want to pick a bill out of mailbox, and have *that* be the reminder that you should be calling me sooner rather than later. I don’t want to call you to remind you to come back for some close contact because tuition is coming due. I definitely don’t want to become an itemized bill on your balance sheet! Please don’t do that to me.

A little while ago (and several times prior) I received an email from a suitor looking to see if I was interested in entering into a sugar-type arrangement. Yeah… doesn’t that seem like a weird question to ask someone you’ve never even met? While I’m sure people do it all the time, as indicated by the bazillion websites that advertise such a thing, I don’t. I’d never commit to seeing someone on a set schedule before knowing if I even like seeing them *once*. I’d imagine that most reasonable men feel the same way, right? If the desire for a certain type of relationship dictates the type of woman you’re looking for, that seems to me to be putting the cart before the horse, really. Let’s get together, see if it’s something we’d like to do more often, and then we can talk about what comes next!

While I do sincerely hope that you’ll call on me again, I don’t ever want to be in the position where I expect you to, or arrange my life so that I need you to. I have a very nice life with several fairly strong, vibrantly fun careers, and you gentlemen are always invited to ice the cake, as it were 🙂 You can call me baby, but I’m still not your sugar baby!

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Tags: CT, etiquette, Maine, travel

This entry was posted on Wednesday, September 26th, 2012 at 10:38 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.